Immunity : Unfiltered

Hello, lovelies — Clare Alexandra here. Lately, life has felt a bit overwhelming — between managing health, doctor appointments, and the endless “ladmin,” it’s easy to lose track of calm. And on top of that, kindness sometimes feels scarce, which only makes things harder. But I’m learning that even small moments of stillness can make a world of difference. Over the last year, I’ve lost 13 kilos following a mostly plant-based, lazy pescatarian diet. While on pilgrimage in Lourdes, maintaining this was easier thanks to the slower pace. Back home, the old stresses creep in, and my joints still ache, but I notice the pain is less than before, so I’m hopeful. It's still chronic... but it's more of a dull ache than a constant stabbing in my knees and ankles... I’m working on moving to a GP surgery that better supports holistic care. When trauma has shaped your experience, you only truly understand how deep it runs once you feel genuine kindness — which can feel unfamiliar and hard...

Let’s begin with an admission: I am  not  a dancer. 🙅‍♀️ My joints have been fiercely battered — whether by CVID, long-COVID, or just the daily wear of being me. The jury's still out (and I hope they're sipping tea whilst they decide). At my previous GP surgery, I was over 80 kilos and couldn’t walk ten steps without severe pain. Now? I walk. I stand. Call it progress, fragile and unfinished — but still progress. I still can't run, I still can't do all the things I should be able to do, but I am no longer crawling up my stairs in my home daily, having daily anxiety attacks, and absolutely housebound. I now just end up in bed sobbing 2 or 3 days a week when I have the ability to gently take care of myself when I do my infusions... sure I pushed through at Lourdes, running on excitement and adrenaline, 4 days after returning home though? I am in bed...typing this up on grammarly... fun...  I am also having to do a lot of medical life-admin (ladmin).... namely where is ...