Propaganda I'm not falling for! - Ableist edition

 20 Pieces of Ableist Propaganda I’m No Longer Falling For

Over the past few months, and more so this month, which is why my blog has been so quiet... something quite unexpected has been happening.

Not in a dramatic, cinematic way. No inspirational movie montage here. Just a slow, quiet process of unlearning things I didn’t even realise I had absorbed. 

When you live with a chronic illness like CVID, you pick up a lot of messages about what you’re supposed to be. Some of them are obvious. Others are so subtle they hide in plain sight for years.

Little ideas about worth. Effort. Productivity. What counts as “deserving”.

A lot of those ideas are, frankly, nonsense.

So here are twenty pieces of ableist propaganda I’m actively unlearning.

Because apparently the brain sometimes needs to hear these things out loud before it believes them.

JUST LOOK at this study space in the library at my uni! WHY WOULDN'T I, or anyone to be more than honest, be OBSESSED with reading and studying here? 

1. “You should only ask for help if you’re in complete crisis.”

Support exists so that people don’t reach crisis point. Waiting until everything collapses is not strength. It’s just unnecessary suffering.

2. “If you can technically push through, you should.”

Technically surviving something and actually functioning well are two very different things.

3. “Other students deserve support more than you.”

Universities do not operate on a scarcity model of compassion. Someone else receiving support does not invalidate your needs.

4. “Accommodations give you an unfair advantage.”

No. They level the playing field. Glasses do not give someone “unfair vision”. They allow them to see.

5. “If you were truly capable, you wouldn’t need adjustments.”

Capability and access are not the same thing. A locked door doesn’t mean the person behind it lacks talent.

6. “If you’re not visibly struggling, you must be fine.”

Invisible illness is still illness.

7. “Rest is laziness.”

Rest is a medical strategy when your immune system behaves like an overworked Victorian factory.

8. “You have to prove how sick you are before you deserve support.”

Human beings should not have to perform suffering to receive basic understanding.

9. “If you’re doing well academically, your illness can’t be that serious.”

Achievement and illness coexist all the time. They are not mutually exclusive categories.

10. “You must handle everything alone to prove your worth.”

Independence is lovely. Community is smarter.

11. “Good students don’t need help.”

Every good researcher I’ve met asks questions constantly.

12. “You’re taking resources away from someone else.”

Support systems are designed to support people. That includes you.

13. “Needing flexibility means you’re unreliable.”

Chronic illness requires adaptability. Ironically, that often makes you more organised than most people.

14. “You should feel guilty for struggling.”

Illness is not a moral failure.

15. “You must always be productive to justify your existence.”

Your worth as a human being is not a spreadsheet.

16. “If you ask for support, people will think you’re incompetent.”

Most people simply think you’re being responsible.

17. “You should wait until things get really bad before telling anyone.”

Early conversations prevent bigger problems later.

18. “It’s all or nothing.”

This one is particularly stubborn. The idea that you must either be completely fine or completely falling apart.

Reality lives somewhere in the middle.

You can be managing well and still need support.

You can be happy and occasionally overwhelmed.

You can be capable and human.

19. “Your past difficulties define your future.”

Previous experiences shape us, but they don’t write the ending.

There was a tragic incident at university recently that unexpectedly stirred memories of a difficult situation from a previous place of study. Sometimes life gently reminds you of things you thought were fully packed away.

But remembering something is not the same as reliving it.

I’m okay.

And I also know that speaking about difficult things when they surface is part of staying okay.

20. “You must earn the right to take up space.”

You already have that right.

Existing is enough.

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So what am I replacing these old beliefs with?

Something a little kinder.

A few affirmations that I’m slowly teaching my brain to accept:

• Asking for help is responsible, not dramatic.
• Support allows people to thrive, not cheat.
• My illness does not cancel my intelligence or ambition.
• Rest is part of success, not the opposite of it.
• Progress does not have to be perfect to be real.
• Life is not an all-or-nothing equation.

Most importantly:

I am allowed to build a life that works for me.

Not the version of life that ignores illness. Not the version that pretends everything is effortless. But a version that is honest, sustainable, and still full of curiosity.

Because despite everything, I really do love what I’m studying.

And that feels like something worth protecting.

One small, well-supported step at a time.

— with my heart! 

Clare Alexandra